UNENDING GROWTH

“Spring, summer, and fall fill us with hope; winter alone reminds us of the human condition.”
–Mignon McLaughlin

“Inside myself is a place where I live all alone, and that’s where I renew my springs that never dry up.”
–Pearl Buck

What is the wonder surrounding winter? So often I perceive it to be joyous and cozy, the stuff of a Norman Rockwell painting. The frigid season begins only days before Christmas, so I suppose this undoubtedly creates a perception of the ideal landscape: bells chirping on the sleigh, wreaths on the doorpost, a fire blazing in the chimney, and the fat turkey on the table surrounded by a family ready to partake of the wondrous dinner. But right now it’s nearing the end of February in Georgia and the piercing wind is consuming my extremities. The sky is gray and Mr. Rockwell’s picture is eluding me; however, two weeks ago I woke to a presence. This presence covered the ground and set the tone for the day. I’m referring to snow, the white manna dropping from the sky. In the fitting words of J.B. Priestley, “The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of a world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment then where is it to be found?” I tend to equate enchantment with fairy tales and Walt Disney, Willy Wonka and the Looney Tunes, but snow is uniquely mysterious, alluring, magnetic, glorious.  This frozen water doesn’t occur much in Georgia, but when it does, schools close, fires are kindled, snowmen are patched together, and society stops for a moment.

The snow started falling Friday afternoon and I rushed to get home from work. I stopped by the grocery store for the weekly trip, but I don’t recall purchasing eggs or bread. Accumulation started picking up, so I decided to bypass the gym too. Safely inside my home, I pulled open the shades for a good view and cleaned the house. After dinner and a few moments with a good book, sleep overtook me like the warm blanket draped on my side. The inducement of a pause is one of the most striking features of snow. This is the first thought I pondered sitting up in my bed Saturday morning. I listened intently to the sounds outside the house, only to discover none. No dogs barked. No cars drove up or down the street. No sirens pierced the air. Consider the moment. What’s the word coming to mind? Silence? Yes, but it’s so much more. I sensed a stillness. All seemed right in the moment. The rigorous energy of the rushed existence stops. Incidentally, one amazing sentence comes to mind when I contemplate this word stillness. I’m reminded once more of an invite evident in the Scriptures: “Be still, and know that I am God.” The invite is to stop striving for a few moments and simply pause. A rushed life doesn’t give much thought to stillness though; moreover, when it occurs, the mind begins gravitating to unfinished tasks-unread e-mails, phone calls to return, dinner plans, and Facebook or Twitter posts. A humorous quip by Will Rogers is fitting in regards to this discussion on living in haste: “Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.”

Stopping to be still is so good though, and I discovered this in an amazing U2 song. Off the No Line on the Horizon album, “White as Snow,” set to the tune of “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel,” moves through the ears with eeriness in the early verses. But it speaks of hope, a journey to find purity, restoration amidst the darkness. Bono closes the song with this word: “If only a heart could be as white as snow.” When I looked over the ground two weeks ago after the snowfall, I studied the whitest white. Clorox bleach pales in comparison. This whiteness reminds me of a painting. A good buddy recently completed three canvases he hung on the wall in the living room. Abstract in scope, I asked for an explanation. He told me the pictures spoke of the marred heart-white, but flecked with black spots. Is this not the condition of man? People strive to live with goodness, but everyone falters. In the Scriptures, Jesus speaks of this with a compelling word: “No one is good.” The writer James puts it like this: “We all stumble in many ways.” Bono uses the phrase “if only.” This is the call to live right, to live with integrity, nobility. In the Scriptures, David speaks of a cleansing. He remarks on the shortcomings of his own life and the plea for wholeness. He writes, “Wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.” Is the true yearning of a person’s heart? From time to time I watch people and think they have their lives together. Appearance gives this perception, but I think deep in my heart I know they, like me, are simply concealing their hurts well, their scars well. The cry is for restoration. The cry is to be white like snow.

In the words of Thoreau, “I frequently tramped eight or ten miles through the deepest snow to keep an appointment with a beech-tree, or a yellow birch, or an old acquaintance among the pines.” Thoreau regards snow as an obstacle in his way in this quote. So it is with society too. In the words of Carl Reiner, “A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water.” Only weeks ago did blizzards pummel numerous states, notably New York, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Maine, and New Hampshire. Federal offices and agencies in Washington, D.C. even closed. And meteorology reports reveal more is on the way in the next few days. With this torrent of frozen water, airport delays unfold and power is cut. Motorists travel at their own risk and the grocery store shelves thin out quickly. In short, economies are interrupted. Lives are interrupted. This disruption also creates clean up cost and states of emergency. Moreover, when it comes to the current economy, the presence of snow is insult to injury in the minds of most. Numerous people must work now, and hindrances constrict the income. Students rejoice with the prospect of missing school, but the voided days will be made up later. Since I work in a school, I know this to be true from personal experience. In spite of the collective total of frustrations one can raise against snowfall, what can be said of its benefits, values, or accolades?

Snow is so pure in appearance, but does it have a way of releasing the pent up child too? Jesus speaks of people discovering the kingdom of God with a child’s disposition. The cold and difficult reality of life grips the mind with age; this is why it’s vital to find yourself again from time to time. I started searching the web moments ago for stories on snow and stumbled into a collection of photographs the New York Times compiled from readers. While most focus on landscapes, including trees, parks, buildings, ponds, and lakes, the ones of children are special in a way words cannot fully capture. Smiles are wide and large; eyes are protruding with exuberance; and I can easily visualize the shrieks of delight during the sled ride or wet ball to the face. Jennifer King notes a few benefits of snow in her life: driving through snow piles is fun and the normal transforms into the magical. Other benefits include the resurgence of youthfulness, soft blankets, coffee, and good reading. I suppose I’m not as idealistic as Ms. King, but I’m trying to reach for the vision in Rockwell’s stirring picture. If it doesn’t come this year, one idea is for sure-winter will return once more. Maybe it’s up to me and you to find the ways we can make the most of this time of year.

Since its March now, I would surmise the New Year’s resolutions are beginning to fade. The declaration is easily made in December, perhaps in haste, but the follow through is surprisingly difficult months later. Lots of people pursue physical fitness, but this piercing wind can keep even the most committed stuck in the home. Making the most of this resolution is the establishment of a resolute will, pressing on in spite of the cold breeze. Making the most of winter comes in the celebration of sunshine, time with a spouse in front of the fire, and stretching the arms and legs to form a snow angel. And one cannot forget the simple but mysterious allure of the snow. I’m reminded of Walt Disney’s masterpiece Fantasia (1940). In one of the final segments, winter fairies dance to Tchaikovsky’s “Waltz of The Flowers.” And during this dance, the petite fairies usher in the appearance of magnificent snowflakes. Incidentally, this piece always reminds me of Christmas, so maybe I’m coming full circle back to the vision Rockwell puts forth. Winter is usually neglected by most people, including me, for the arrival of spring, but maybe I should step back and meditate on the inherent sparkle of this season too. In the words of Lady Bird Johnson, “When I no longer thrill to the first snow of the season, I’ll know I’m growing old.” Thankfully, snow still captures my imagination. And maybe God has a sense of humor-it snowed again today.

“Solitude is the place of purification.”
–Martin Buber

“I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears, and sweat.”
–Winston Churchill

I suppose only a handful of people know this, but I finally joined a gym on December 23rd, 2009. I pondered the decision for months, but finally signed the papers two days before Christmas. Running for roughly three years now, I discovered it would be wise to cross train more on a stationary bicycle inside. In fact, a journey of (slowly) lifting weights is underway too. I intend to purchase a bike when the temperature outside rises in the forthcoming months, but I’m currently finding the time indoors to be a warming experience. Incidentally, this warm feeling is very physical with the conclusion of a daily workout: sitting in the sauna. This is the first time I have enjoyed the presence of the small sweat box since 2005. My brother and I traveled to Cozumel and Grand Cayman together on a Carnival cruise ship, and this is when I first discovered the purifying power of very hot vapor. After running laps on the top deck and dropping my slim frame into the bubbling jacuzzi, I limply trudged into the inferno. Minutes elapsed, and I started to notice the moisture rise up through the epidermis; droplets formed, and unable to stay stationary, they all raced down the arms, legs, and face. Cleansing raged through my pores. Restoration filled my body.

My uncle recently installed a jacuzzi on the rear porch, and I savored the opportunity to rest in it the Wednesday night before Thanksgiving last year. Bubbles surrounded me, and jets of water pulsed into my back. What’s the intrigue with a sauna though? Why is a wooden oven so popular? Numerous thoughts come to mind, but consider a few. In terms of physical wellness, saunas relieve sore muscles and alleviate arthritis, asthma, and chronic fatigue, along with reducing the frequency of colds. Blood flow increases too. But I suppose the most obvious benefit is perspiration. Or, to be more pointed, sweat. Once inside the box, heat (and possibly steam) overtake the skin and induce moisture; droplets rise through the pores and drop to the ground. The sweating process is an amazing detoxification. Case in point: pause and consider the ingredients, additives, chemicals, preservatives, oils, and fats present in the foods consumed on a daily basis. Lift up a store brand cake from Kroger, Publix, or Wal Mart and turn it over to peruse the ingredient list. The lineup can fill a novel, and the majority of the words present are difficult to pronounce. Furthermore, what are their purposes? I believe it’s wise to conclude the majority of these ingredients should not be in the body, and this is where the wondrous sauna comes in to play. Time in the box yields a river of sweat and a powerful way to flush the body of the unnecessary garbage inside it.

In the words of Yoko Ono, “Healing yourself is connected with healing others.” Another reality I have noticed inside the sauna is the ability to connect with others. Incidentally, I shared a conversation this evening with a member of the gym I have crossed paths with a few times. Our exchange focused on exercise routines, form, and other thoughts concerning physical fitness. The subject matter can always go deeper though. I talked with someone else recently about religion, and discovered it is truly refreshing to discuss a potent subject openly without anger or condemnation. So often the subject of religion or politics is the stuff one hears of in Washington, full of partisan tension. To speak freely, however, is a welcome change. For me, this disposition is underscored by love, the healing Yoko Ono references. Jesus puts it so plainly in the Scriptures: “Love one another.” And consider the words of St. Paul: “Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another.” All staff members in the school I work for this year are studying a book on the principle of building up others. The tome, How Full is Your Bucket?, focuses on the ways recognition and praise can benefit people. The thought seems simple and obvious, but so often it becomes easy to develop a spirit of cynicism in life. The current economic tension, unemployment levels, income reduction, and tragedy in Haiti are capable of crushing the boldest in strength. But it’s amazing to discover that uplifting others provides strength to the lifter too.

Another truth time in the sweat box reveals to me is the presence of depletion. Experts recommend that people consume 3-4 glasses of water after time in the sauna. Since sweat is comprised of water, the major loss of this vital nutrient facilitates dehydration. A relaxed feeling overtakes the body after time in the sauna, but fatigue tends to surface too. Life can drain one’s strength quickly, and I believe Jackson Browne affirms this in his excellent tune “Running on Empty.” Like Browne notes in the lyrics, this life does feel crazy from time to time. Moreover, it exacts strong pressure on all people. One begins to sink in the mud and mire and lifts up a cry for hope, for rescue. A bucket with holes longs to be plugged and filled once more. According to Bucket author Tom Rath, “Regardless of an individual’s innate starting point, regular bucket filling can increase his or her positive emotions.” Although this comment is one for motivational speaking seminars, consider the practical implications. What does bucket filling look like? I have discovered a simple phone call to a friend is a good starting point; for others, sharing life over coffee in Starbucks is good. And still others are enamored to receive a hand written letter. Notice all these examples require time, energy, and even cost (financial or opportunity). Albert Ellis puts it best though: “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” Love for another requires persistence, desire, will, intention.

Since time in the sauna rounds out a daily gym session for me, it is the mark of completion. Or, in the words of Heywood Hale Broun, “Sweat is the cologne of accomplishment.” Pain and grunts collide in the midst of a workout and yield perspiration, but it’s the torrent of moisture in the wood box I remember on the drive home. Oddly enough, it’s the music people enter into during a workout that amplifies strength and pushes the body to new limits. And new limits mean more sweat. I remember a marathon I completed last December in Huntsville, Alabama. During the drive to the race, a friend wondered which song would “jack me up” in energy. The phrase “jacked up” generally refers a problem with a physical object or process, but it’s also used to refer to the high people experience. For some, it’s born of drugs. For runners, like me, it’s the euphoria of stride, pain, and breath, the mysterious “runner’s high” constantly debated. We listened to “Blow Me Away” by Breaking Benjamin minutes before parking for the race, but in the case of this meditation, the one significant song in iTunes referring to perspiration is “Gonna Make You Sweat” (Everybody Dance Now) by C+C Music Factory, the 1990 techno tune for dancing the night away. Running, like all hard work, is the dance of longevity, staying with a task until it’s completed. In the process, sweat will appear. Blood might appear too. But this is the price of toil done well. Or is it toil well done? Persius puts it best: “He conquers who endures.”

It’s funny to think that sweat is the body’s way of staying cool. In this current season, winter, beads on the back, arms, legs and forehead are rare to find, but it still manages to surface in numerous places. Gyms are one place, but I know extreme diaphoresis can occur outside in the biting cold too. Roughly three weeks ago I went for a run on a Saturday morning; the temperature registered nineteen degrees. I layered up, and while the first five miles were very chilly, I finished the long run with a saturated thermal cap and gloves. In other words, the body is staying cool through perspiration even in freezing weather. Odd but true. I believe sweat is a reality not discussed enough in life. So many people desire to bypass the work process and proceed straight to the results, the fruits of labor. I often visualize the end results of the workout, but know a journey also possesses an origin. Strong arm, leg, and abdominal muscles come in time. Ponder the words of Stephen Covey: “To begin with the end in mind means to start with a clear understanding of your destination. It means to know where you’re going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction.” I pursue steps in the right direction, and during this journey of wellness, I know time in the wood box, shoes on the pavement, and the calluses on my hands will be marking ways to remember the refreshing, salty dew dripping down my body.

“Everybody gets so much information all day long that they lose their common sense.”
–Gertrude Stein

“The more you know the less you feel.”
–Bono

Graduate school resumed yesterday, and one of the courses I’m enrolled in focuses on information literacy and its role in education. In short, this term frames the process of accessing, locating, analyzing, and sifting through information. Author and management expert Peter Drucker calls it “learning how to learn.” Incidentally, the challenge is usually not literacy, but sifting through the torrent of available data-graphs, books, annual statements, blogs, user comments, articles, magazines, trade journals, and even tweets. This is information overload. The University of California, San Diego, compiled the results of a study outlining data consumption for 2008. The report, How Much Information?, reveals amazing truths in the Executive Summary: “In 2008, Americans consumed information for about 1.3 trillion hours, an average of almost 12 hours per day. Consumption totaled 3.6 zettabytes (a million million gigabytes) and 10,845 trillion words, corresponding to 100,500 words and 34 gigabytes for an average person on an average day.” Radio and television comprised the majority of the total hours, but notice this compelling remark: “Reading, which was in decline due to the growth of television, tripled from 1980-2008, because it is the overwhelming preferred way to receive words on the Internet.”

When I consider this stunning conclusion, trying to explain it to myself in simple terms is difficult. It’s worth a shot though. 34 gigabytes is the reported figure in the study, so ponder this possibility. In iTunes, I currently have 13.88 gigabytes worth of music (this is 3,301 songs). Accordingly, 34 gigabytes of music translates to roughly 8,000 songs (give or take a few hundred based on length). I can only speculate on the amount of time it would take me to listen to 8,000 songs if I started 12 days ago on January 1st; I would surmise the whole year. Incidentally, I discovered moments ago that 35.9 gigabytes of space are currently in use on my notebook’s hard drive. Based on this study, I have figuratively absorbed all this information through my eyes and/or ears. Speaking of hard drives, portable ones are popular right now, and most are capable of storing 1-2 terabytes of information; however, consider the way prefixes reveal the future possibilities. After tera, one ventures into peta (quadrillion), exa (quintillion), zetta (sextillion), and yotta (septillion). Picture someone walking around with a hard drive no larger than an iPhone capable of holding 1 yottabyte of information. This information would likely be music, photos, apps (applications), films, television shows, and electronic books. Consider the words of Wired editor Chris Anderson: “If computing power for a given price doubles every two years, a given unit of computing power (processing power, storage, bandwidth) will fall in price by 50 percent over the same period.”

I find it easy and fun to focus on the way information and media converge, but the real ramifications of the phrase “paralysis by analysis” are potentially frightening. Investigation into the actions of Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, the 23 year old Nigerian suspected of trying to detonate a bomb in a plane destined for Detroit only weeks ago, still continues. Fingers are being pointed right now, and commentary on missing the obvious signs is surfacing in news reports. The BBC reported that the United Kingdom had intelligence on the suspect and relayed it to U.S. authorities, but it appears the dots were not connected. When it comes to multiple organizations exchanging information, the unknown terrorists can slip through the cracks and become the ones who grab media coverage for very heinous actions. President Obama called this security lapse “human and systemic failures.” I concur, and affirm the value of proper information exchange between agencies, officials, soldiers, and countries. In spite of this failure, the strength of common sense is noticeably evident (and noticeably absent in news coverage); passengers on the plane noticed a disturbance, responded with action, and boldly snuffed out the possibility of murder by a coward. Like Captain Chesley Sullenberger III, responsible for landing a plane (US Airways Flight 1549) safely in the Hudson and saving 153 lives, the people in this heroic tale (Northwest Airlines Flight 253) should be lifted high in valor too. TIME columnist Amanda Ripley makes an excellent remark on this subject: “Since regular people will always be first on the scene of terrorist attacks, we should perhaps prioritize the public’s antiterrorism capability-above and beyond the fancy technology that will never be foolproof.” Good judgment tends to trump analysis from time to time.

What is the antidote to information overload? Do people even desire it? Or is it strongly resisted? Sam Anderson, writing for New York magazine, defends the deluge of daily distractions. In his compelling article, he notes this quote by economist Herbert A. Simon: “What information consumes is rather obvious: It consumes the attention of its recipients. Hence a wealth of information creates a poverty of attention, and a need to allocate that attention efficiently among the overabundance of information sources that might consume it.” Anderson also references tech theorist Linda Stone, who coined the term “continuous partial attention,” which is the inability to focus on a single task for an extended period of time. In spite of this supposed problem, people are accomplishing tasks nonetheless. Children are growing up in this environment, and time will reveal the results. Will multiple stimuli be managed well or become chaos for the mind? Anderson’s piece can be summarized with this major takeaway: “It’s possible that were evolving toward a new techno-cognitive nomadism, in which restlessness will be an advantage.”

Anderson defends distraction, but a unique remedy for breakthrough is continuing to gain traction: lifehacking. According to the Lifehacker blog (lifehacker.com), tips and shortcuts are available to help visitors “get things done smarter and more efficiently.” Recent entries in the site include changing (“hacking”) the components of a sandwich to make it more spicy for those who pack a lunch everyday and details on a new site I’m just discovering (webmii.com). Incidentally, a group of people are putting together a documentary (lifehackingmovie.com) on the process of lifehacking. You 2.o focuses on the process of streamlining life to pursue a purposeful goal. While this process sounds like a good investment of one’s time, I wonder if it too can also become one more distraction. In other words, time and energy consumed for finding ways to save time and become more productive or focused effectively cancels out any gains made. Merlin Mann, creator of 43 Folders (43folders.com), is a lifehacking expert, but believes where time is directed is of immense importance. Speaking with Sam Anderson for his article, he states, “Where you allow your attention to go ultimately says more about you as a human being than anything that you put in your mission statement. It’s an indisputable receipt for your existence.” I concur with this statement, and affirm this process as it pertains to time. The day is limited in hours, but this is my philosophy regarding time. If a task, event, meeting, dinner date, trip to the gym, coffee gathering with a friend or run is important to me, it will be done. The approach changes from “If I have time” to “I will make time.”

Notice all the possible distractions in this meditation. I’m discovering the power of parentheses; these oval shaped lines are excellent ways to insert other points of note quickly, but it’s amazing to realize they can become divergences too. For instance, I wonder if you have already visited some of the websites I have noted (Lifehacker or Web Mii), remembered a new song not yet downloaded (“Fireflies” by Owl City or “Party in the U.S.A.” by Miley Cyrus), or find it prudent to reevaluate your concept of time. One of the recent posts on the 43 Folders website includes a video with this quote to start it: “We procrastinate when we’ve forgotten who we are.” When I reflect on this comment more, the value is extraordinary for me. A bona fide maven (information gatherer), I savor knowledge and the process of absorbing information. But how much does it deflect from what matters most? Graduate school requires a lot of my attention right now, but a sticky note next to my laptop contains space for this line: “Publish book.” Days continue to pass, but this process is unfinished. Stepping back, this question must be posed: “What is occurring in my free time?” Is intention going into accomplishing this goal? The answer is no, and thus fresh focus is needed, fresh alignment. I like staying tuned into the world through information, but in the process am I tuning out what matters to me, the projects I love doing? Is procrastination creeping through? I believe it’s time to hack my life and remember who I am once more.